Firstly, happy birthday to possibly the shittest friend i have ever acquired.
dickdickdickdickdick...
WGSFG is a hell hole. I returned for about an hour today, some shitty awards ceremony thing and got my GCSE certificates, within 5 minutes of being in the building i was repeatedly telling bekki how i was going home immediately she told me i wasn't and like a dumb puppy i stayed. I also triest my hardest to retain the tears that were ready to trickle their mindless little ways down my face, due to seeing my once best friend get a smile and a "hi" and that was it....that was it ? wow after nearly 2 fucking years of..well i cant put a word to it, but i've never loved a friend so much.
i then had to walk up on stage, how many eyes watching i dont know cos i didnt look at one single person, i must have looked like such a depressive fuck, walkin up and down the stage with my hand infront of my face(rubbing my nose) and eyes glued to the floor as if it was the most beautiful thing i'd ever seen, then whilst working my fat body between 2 rows of seats back to my own, silly me decided it would be a fantastic idea to drop my certificates...well done.
i then decided to go for a walk around all the rooms that gave me the most laughs, chemo,maths&bio, oh the times. i miss them immature bitches, stuffy classrooms, slow hours and shit food so much. Whoever would have thought that I , of all people, would miss it so much, it felt so weird,looking back into them rooms, just reflected faint dreams id had, that were far from real.
It doesn't feel like it ever happened.
i then progressed to wait in the bus stop in the pouring rain with bekki and chain smoke 3 ciggarettes.
...then return home, exercise my fat arse&stomach off, think about todays glorious events and everything else in my life and think "why?"and .."what the fuck do i do?.." and then publish a blog :)
BOOM.
Friday, 6 November 2009
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